Once a week, the members of The OC Round Table will deliver their uncensored, unabashed, unwavering views on various issues affecting the show and its characters. Not so much knights as raucous fans of this FOX phenom, these pundits will comment on every aspect that hits the airways, from Ryan‘s bird-like facial expressions to Luke‘s transition from hotheaded jock to complete and utter loser. Agree with their views? Disagree? Send in your thoughts, comments, questions or harassing diatribes to any or all of the supposed sages. They‘ll publish viewer feedback in each subsequent edition of the Round Table. Now, it‘s time to pull up a chair, meet our panelists and dissect their takes on the shocking twists and turns that comprise The OC.

The panel:

Name: Matty Rich Favorite character: Sandy The OC words to live by: Kirsten: So what do you want to be, now? Ryan: Seventeen. Contact: Private Message

Name: Darkly Noon Favorite character: Ryan The OC words to live by: Juile: We're celebrating my new position. Sandy: I'm not gonna touch that one. Contact: Private Message

Name: Max Power Favorite character: Hailey The OC words to live by: Puuuuuddding!

Will Kirsten fall off the wagon?

Matty Rich: One would hope that this dreamy drunkard would simply caulk her wagon and float across the river to perpetual sobriety. If she needs to hire an Indian for assistance, though, so be it. As long as Kirsten avoids alcohol, snake bites and dysentery at all costs, she should be ok.

Max Power: Depends where that wagon's going? If it's heading down the road to Prohibition City, MO, I'm sure she'll fall off somewhere near Drunkard's Branch, TX.

Darkly Noon: I didn't see any wagon at that rehab center.

Discuss Kirsten's sobriety on the message board.

How does being a werewolf make you a better basketball player?

Darkly Noon: Is it that complicated? Presumably, the kid who later became "Teen Wolf" knew how to play basketball, but lacked the physical gifts (being your typical suburban white geek) to be successful. Give to said geek the lower-body strength, agility and quickness of a wolf, however, and you have a beast with a deadly perimeter game who is also hard as hell to defend in the low post.

Matty Rich: It's all about heart. Scientific facts haven't done anything to prove that werewolves possess an aorta at least four times the size of the average human being. Combine that desire with their survival instincts and it's no wonder that these beasts simply want it more than their competition each time they step onto the court.

Max Power: It's more of a general intimidation factor. I mean, you're vicious, hairy and smell like a wet dog. Who's gonna want to guard that? And what ref is gonna call a foul on someone that's likely to rip out his throat? If you want to see an actual basketball-playing werewolf, picture Steve Nash. With less shaggy hair.

Discuss the new werewolves on the message board.

Random thoughts/questions (Part I)

• Marissa, your blatant anorexia would be considered an "elephant in the room."
• Shooting your boyfriend's brother is more along the lines or a humpback whale in the closet.
• Maybe someday Newport police will learn how to check for gunpowder residue on the hands of suspects and save themselves a lot of stress.
• Kirsten plays poker, too?!? This isn't fair.

Should Julie have offered Trey more than $20,000 in exchange for his lie?

Max Power: She should have thrown in a lifetime supply of hair gel. How else is Trey gonna look good in a coma?

Darkly Noon: Definitely. If you are about to inherit millions, why try to low-ball Trey? Money talks, but it'd take a six-figure offer to talk loud enough for the savvy thug to falsely implicate his own brother. Plus, in today's America, $20K isn't even going to cover his medical bills, or the legal fees for his defense, after attempting to rape Marisa and kill Ryan.

Matty Rich: I thought she was throwing that pillow into the deal, too. Either way, $20,000 seems to be about what Marissa is worth. Her whining, poor acting and overall worthlessness has cost me approximately that much in anger management classes.

Discuss Julie's bribe on the message board.

What is Jimmy's real motivation for getting back together with his ex-wife?

Darkly Noon: Money, sex and the chance to see more of his eldest daughter, Marissa.

Matty Rich: What can't he be inspired by the realization that this gold-digging, tang bucket is truly the love of his life? If he can look past her abandonment during the time he needed her the most, her lying, cheating, pornographic past, entirely selfish nature and occasionally long showers, who are we to judge? Follow your heart, Jimbo.

Max Power: Crazy porn star sex. And maybe to find out where Julie stashed Caitlin.

Discuss Jimmy on the message board.

Random thoughts/questions (Part II)

• So Sandy can't cook without Kirsten around? He sure had us fooled for the past two years. With all those meals he made and everything.
• During the episode, a petrified Liz Noon chimed in: "I'm scared of Trey. I hope he doesn't wake up!"
• I don't know which I miss more: the appearances of Zack or my virginity?
• I wonder if they showed Boston Public reruns at the rehab center?

Discuss Random thoughts on the message board.