Once a week, the members of The OC Round Table will deliver their uncensored, unabashed, unwavering views on various issues affecting the show and its characters. Not so much knights as raucous fans of this FOX phenom, these pundits will comment on every aspect that hits the airways, from Ryan‘s bird-like facial expressions to Luke‘s transition from hotheaded jock to complete and utter loser. Agree with their views? Disagree? Send in your thoughts, comments, questions or harassing diatribes to any or all of the supposed sages. They‘ll publish viewer feedback in each subsequent edition of the Round Table. Now, it‘s time to pull up a chair, meet our panelists and dissect their takes on the shocking twists and turns that comprise The OC.

The panel:

Name: Matty Rich Favorite character: Sandy The OC words to live by: Kirsten: So what do you want to be, now? Ryan: Seventeen. Contact: Private Message

Name: Darkly Noon Favorite character: Ryan The OC words to live by: Juile: We're celebrating my new position. Sandy: I'm not gonna touch that one. Contact: Private Message

Name: Rutherford B. Chillin' Favorite character: Sandy The OC words to live by: I'm just saying that you're daughter has an extraordinary amount of vim.

Which is the more desperate situation: Taylor's need for friends or the writers' need to stick Kaitlin in a time machine?

Matty Rich: What about our need to trump each Taylor tidbit with talented, alliterative accuracy? This tough task tabled for a moment, the desperate cry for creativity from the writing staff is evident here. No one seems to have a clue how to involve characters the audience actually cares about in any ongoing story line - Ryan as Marissa's accessory and Sandy/Kirsten exchanging the occasional glance is far from entertainment at its finest - so why not accelerate Kaitlin's aging process?!? Tune in next week when Theresa's baby returns as Ryan's uncle!

Darkly Noon: I gotta go with Taylor. Sure the whole Kaitlin thing seems desperate, not to mention amateurish and perhaps archetypal in terms of shark jumping. But you have to admit the concept of a time machine is still pretty cool. If only the writers could build one for themselves, then embark on an epic journey back to the mid-1990s and change careers.

Rutherford B. Chillin': I would say that Kaitlin's blatant bending of the rules of time and aging is the far more desperate situation, except it's laying the groundwork for a Ryan-Marissa-Bill-Ted love quartet that should take us through sweeps week. Taylor's need for friends is much more desperate, especially since I have said time and again that I am more than willing to be TT's boy who is more than a friend. I have "Willow" on DVD, I seldom cry after sexual congress anymore, and I have "Willow" on VHS. I'm a real catch!

Discuss Kaitlin's age on the message board.

What's the best thing you can say about Johnny?

Darkly: This guy bothers me so much, I can't even bring myself to praise his hair. What a disgrace to shaggy, unkempt people everywhere. He's got a bunch of cool namesakes at least. Think of all the noteworthy Johnnys out there. You have the turncoat outfielder who left Boston for the f--king Yankees, the legendary host of "The Tonight Show," and the mysterious dude who always seems to be on the spot, wherever that may be. Plus, there are Johnnys making names for themselves in the movies and even in up-and-coming fields like debt consolidation!

Rutherford: His knee is fine. No, the other one.

Matty: The amount of time I've spent sleeping as a result of his personality has caused me not to notice that Marissa hasn't eaten in six weeks. I worry a lot less about her now.

Discuss More Johnny on the message board.

Random thoughts/questions (Veronica Townsend edition)

• If Veronica's influence over Marissa is anything like her power at last week's board meeting, it's a good thing the Cohens gave into her threats.
• Does anyone else think Veronica and Dean Hess are the same person?
• If so, that kiss with Taylor must've been really awkward.
• Dr, Roberts does good work. It looks likes Mrs. T. went from an A cup to an L cup.
• Do you think Veronica also threatened to make the lives of the writers a living hell if they focused on anyone outside of Marissa for more than six seconds?

If the Cooper daughters didn't exist, would Ryan ever leave the pool house?

Rutherford: Only if he was going someplace to get directions back to the pool house.

Darkly: Of course. Someone has to watch over Johnny!

Matty: Probably not. He's got a punching bag in there, remember? Of course, if he doesn't have Marissa's face to picture on it, what's the point? But in all seriousness, folks, I despise that skeletal waste of space.

Discuss the Boring Ryan on the message board.

Sign this petition to create a spin off featuring just Taylor, Summer and Seth

Darkly: Darkly

Matty: Matty Rich

Rutherford: Matt Gorman

Discuss Summer, Seth and Taylor on the message board.

Random thoughts/questions (Part II)

• Columbine. Gulf Region hurricanes. Abortion. John Kerry. This episode was more political than the Alito confirmation hearings.
• Theresa and Kaitlin must've shared a good laugh over their pregnancy tales.
• Kaitlin looks to have aged a lot.
• In a completely unrelated note, other phrases for "Jumping the Shark" include: Circling the Drain and Walking Dead.

Discuss Random thoughtson the message board.