Once a week, the members of The OC Round Table will deliver their uncensored, unabashed, unwavering views on various issues affecting the show and its characters. Not so much knights as raucous fans of this FOX phenom, these pundits will comment on every aspect that hits the airways, from Ryan‘s bird-like facial expressions to Luke‘s transition from hotheaded jock to complete and utter loser. Agree with their views? Disagree? Send in your thoughts, comments, questions or harassing diatribes to any or all of the supposed sages. They‘ll publish viewer feedback in each subsequent edition of the Round Table. Now, it‘s time to pull up a chair, meet our panelists and dissect their takes on the shocking twists and turns that comprise The OC.

The panel:

Name: Matty Rich Favorite character: Sandy The OC words to live by: Kirsten: So what do you want to be, now? Ryan: Seventeen. Contact: Private Message

Name: Max Power Favorite character: Hailey The OC words to live by: Puuuuuddding!

Name: Darkly Noon Favorite character: Ryan The OC words to live by: Juile: We're celebrating my new position. Sandy: I'm not gonna touch that one.

Who was more selfish for leaving Newport: Seth at the end of the first season or Jimmy now?

Matty Rich: Few incidents in the history of imaginary people have gotten me more riled up than Seth abandoning his parents and his girlfriend at the end of season one. It was childish and it was self-centered. For further condemnation to be aimed at a different action, it must be worthy of the scorn - Jimmy ditching Newport for Maui qualifies as such an action. In defense of Seth's immature behavior, he is, well, immature. He's in high school, bound by no true responsibilities or obligations. Jimmy, however, is a father, the apple of his children's eye. What will they do without this Granny Smith guidance? Even if your daughter is a malnourished malcontent, there is no excuse for leaving because you "need to get a life." You have a life, Jimbo, it should be dedicated to your daughters. I mean, do you even know where Caitlin is?

Max Power: Does anyone else find this situation to be hysterical? Come on, Marissa, is it that shocking that your dad is hooking up with *gulp* your mom? And why doesn't Marissa take up her father's offer to move to Maui? What would she be leaving behind besides constant emotional stress? So anyway back to the question. Obviously Jimmy's the most irresponsible and selfish one here. Seth is a teenager, he's supposed to overreact, be angry and do stupid things. Jimmy's decided that he can't be responsible and can't stop hooking up with his wife, WHO LEFT HIM FOR MONEY AND TO DISTANCE HERSELF FROM THE SHAME!!! Jimmy, go find your balls, I think Hailey took them when she flew off to Japan.

Darkly Noon: Seth takes this one. Jimmy is heading for the Pacific because, in nearly all of his actions over the past years, he has left a path of destruction in his wake. Heading to Hawaii for a few months will probably do everyone some good. Whether or not it will remains to be seen, but at least those are his intentions. Seth, conversely, caused unnecessary turmoil to loved ones simply because of his departure.

Discuss the more selfish move on the message board.

Who is the better drunk: Seth or Marissa?

Darkly Noon: When it comes to drunks, it's hard to say what prototype is best. The blithering Seth Cohen types - entertaining, albeit annoying lightweights? Bitter, foul-mouthed drama queens like Marissa? Someone like Darkly in his college days, whose passive-aggressive tendencies often gave way to relentless, unfocused rage against inanimate objects? Tough call. Ultimately, if you're looking for good times and good laughs, and don't mind some late-night babysitting, I think you have to take Seth. It's better to wake up the next morning humiliated or sick than disowned or in jail.

Matty Rich: This is akin to choosing my favorite parent. Or most beloved wristband. How does one compare the boozed-up buffoonery of Seth to the wasted war path that Marissa was on? While Seth entertained like only he can, his performance has been done before: vomiting, falling down in front of the father, not exactly fresh material there. But when Marissa is drunk and on the attack, she finally serves a worthwhile purpose on the show. She frightens everyone. She doesn't hold back. Her venom is directed at thieves and sluts, as though she is starving for insults and only the alcohol provides her with gumption to deliver them. As viewers, it's difficult to stomach the fury, but it's never disappointing.

Max Power: Let's ask a question: Who are you better friends with, the drunk who tries to kill herself, crashes several parties, and blames people for her own problems? Or the friend who blurts out secrets, is too loud and funny and vomits everywhere? Hey, at least when Marissa throws up it's because she chooses to do it. And I just don't like cleaning up puke, so I'll pick Marissa any day.

Discuss the new the better drunk on the message board.

Random thoughts/questions (Part I)

• When I move away, there better be valet parking at my party.
• Note to Zack: Get a friend to confide in who has not been in love with your girlfriend since childhood.
• There were 70 seconds of uninterrupted music by Modest Mouse last night. We timed it.
• It just keeps getting worse for Marissa. It doesn't get much worse than seeing ... your parents back together.

Ok, so who was the guy who answered Alex's door?

Max Power: One of the singers of Modest Mouse. Side note: Hey OC, I like what you're trying to do with the whole concert thing, trying to be edgy and everything, but do you really have to spend over a minute just showing the band playing? The only time that's ever responsible is if you bring back Steve Perry and have the original Journey on the show. I'd love to see Ryan go crazy with that.

Darkly Noon: Probably a friend from one of the high schools she was asked to leave.

Matty Rich: He was the bad boy in all of us. Look, Seth is not the only "nice" guy who grows frustrated each time he sees a beautiful, sweet woman climbing onto the back of a Harley, arms tightly wrapped around a tattoo-laden, tobacco-chewing punk who would beat up his own mother if she offered him a Shirley Temple. All gentle souls yearn to channel a piece of this bad assery. That topless, scraggly individual who responded to the knock only existed in Seth's mind. He represented all that Seth is not and all that he feels as though he need to be.

Discuss the random guy on the message board.

Evaluate Zach's apology technique to Summer.

Darkly Noon: What Executive Producer McG inexplicably left out of the script is the plot line in which Zach is swarmed by political heavyweights immediately after leaving Summer's house. The way he weaseled out of their latest "fight" - in which he cheats on her, then miraculously spins the situation into a positive step in their relationship (!?) - was downright Clintonesque. A run for office can't be far off for this handsome young Casanova. The best part? It's California, where no discernible skills or public service background are required, and all one needs to be elected governor are a few million signatures.

Matty Rich: Pure genius. Zach cheats on Summer and manages to turn the situation around to focus on her constant Seth blubbering. Yes, it's the first fight between them that is not related to Seth. Somehow, that makes up for the fact that Zach attempted to solve the pythagorean theorem with his tongue during winter vacation. I'm pretty sure the infidelity has brought the couple closer. Gentlemen, we can all learn a lesson here.

Max Power: Zach, I don't know how preppy kids fight, but that wasn't a fight. It was an emasculating apology. A fight is when you argue about something and people have opposing views. Let's recap: you kissed your tutor (nice job by the way), felt awful about it (good for you) and then tried to tell Summer (oops) But where's the fight? You weren't saying, 'hey it's not my fault, don't get angry at me.' You sympathized with Summer immediately, there's no argument there. Just an attempt to win her back. So Zach, good line to get Summer back, but it really wasn't a fight. And PS, who wants to cheat on Summer anyway?

Discuss Zach's apology on the message board.

Random thoughts/questions (Part II)

• They want us to believe that Hailey is 25?
• And then they don't give us her phone number?.
• I wonder which gets you in more trouble: tequilla and Chingy or Jack Daniels and Lil' John?
• If Marissa doesn't like cream cheese, then oh boy, Sandy just made her morning even worse.

Discuss Random thoughts on the message board.