
“And this would be no ordinary Bar Mitzvah, Ryan, this would be... wait for it... wait for it... a Chrismukkah Bar Mitz-Vahkah!”
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Sandy (in reference to Ryan): It's amazing, his lips don't even move.
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9.1 outta 10
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Seth: Our ex-girlfriends? Not allowed in the red states.
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Seth: “You’re taking all that? You only own, like, a wifebeater and two hoodies.”
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Ryan: I didn’t tell her anything. I think the black turtle neck in August tipped her off.
Seth: Okay, I was going for stealth, and also it's slimming.
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“What are the symptoms? You become incredibly annoying?”
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Ryan: Do not insult Journey.
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Lance: "What the hell is that?"
Julie: "It's a gun genius. You use it to shoot people you want to kill."
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